My room has a ladder that has access to my roof—-took this yesterday.
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2013 has had its on and off moments. I feel like I’ve faced a lot more self doubt this year than any other year in my life which is kind of unfortunate. It’s toxic and it tainted what use to be my free spirit. It’s always harder pulling yourself out of a rut than it is falling into one. But on the other hand, I have also experienced a lot of firsts and a kind of fulfillment I’ve never felt before. I need to remind myself to be grateful for that, because I don’t think that I appreciate the way I need to.
Early yesterday morning I took my dog Sophia and a german shep out to the forest preserve. When we got there it started to pour. The three of us sat in the car and it started to thunder. My Sophia is terrified of thunder, she has been for the past 8 yrs of her life. She stays up crying, whining, and pawing at me as if I could stop it. It’s a sad sight for sure….
Anyway. So she’s sitting in the car paranoid, freaking out, feeling trapped as it’s thundering. I thought, fuck it. Let’s go for a jog in the rain. I pulled both dogs out and we started walking on a trail. It started to thunder/pour some more, and I saw Soph and Sampson tense up. Thundered again, she looks at me super wide eyed. So I started to jog a bit, encouraging and rooting for them to follow and they did. Before I knew it, Soph was her normal forest preserve self. She was jumping in puddles, chasing the german shep, chasing me. Having a blast while thunder was going on above us. I was so so so proud of her.
Later on, I climbed up to my roof to chill a little. After I took the photo above, I climbed back down and went to the store to pick up some shit. Went to the pet section and bought her a bitchin indoor doghouse. Took a picture of it and summarized this story for an instagram post. A friend of mine wrote, “Go Sophia!! Conquer those fears!” and it was like someone smacked me in the face. My little 11lb dog conquered her greatest fear with no understanding of what thunder is or that I wouldn’t let her get hurt.
This afternoon I looked at her and that insane underbite of hers, and was given the encouragement I needed.
I know yall already think I’m a crazy dog lady. Fersure. Makes sense and I don’t argue it, but you can learn a lot from animals and especially your very own. I’m pretty grateful for that moment.
Here’s to you, Sophia. You can’t read, you don’t know what the internet is, but hopefully all of the junk food I feed you, kisses I give you, and carrying you up and down all of them stairs fulfills you the way you fulfill me.
